Tuesday, December 20, 2011

The Ghost of Christmas Present

The year is winding down. Days are ticking off the calendar like the small remainder of leaves ripped from the trees in this morning's wind gusts. It's strange realizing that Christmas is less than a week away. I used to have trouble believing how people could actually be depressed during the holiday season, but now it's not so far-fetched. And while this year the loss of my Nonna is easier to bear than it was last year, it is still hard this time of year knowing that I won't ever again be able to make fraitz with her bustling around the kitchen or listen to her high soprano singing old Italian Christmas songs.

Move over, Martha Stewart!
It is becoming increasingly easier to hold her memory in my  heart without sinking into the sadness of loss. Nevertheless, I still long for her - her very essence - especially on this most festive of months.

Considering my life last year and how far the past 300+ days have brought me, I can't really complain too much. I am so cozy in my Little Mansion with my Teacup Panther and my Giant Nova Scotian Balsam Fir all decked out in gold and red.
I have loved decorating for Christmas this year. And, despite not being able to go to Buffalo this year, there's no other place I'd rather be than snuggled in with my family on good ol' Cape Cod, cooking and eating and drinking and watching Christmas movies together.

So no, I'm not depressed this year, but I understand the joy and peace so much more than ever before. Much to love, much to cherish, much to celebrate.

God bless us, everyone

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