Dear My Left Knee-
Stop being such a mamby pamby. It was only four miles...don't even act like you've never seen that much action before. I know you're a whore for the road, so stop acting like you don't like it when the road gives it to you rough. What? Did you think that you could just repose at a desk chair all day and be fine? Well think again! You have 8-hours of waitressing in front of you, so pull it the eff together!
I have my eye on you,
Dear My Right Hip-
Stop immitating Left Knee. She's not going to pay attention to you just because you think it's cool to copy her. Cease and desist immediately or I will never take you dancing again.
You have been forwarned,